The One Rule

On the previous post I described The One Rule thus:

The male wants to earn an orgasm and is willing to do as much as he can to please his woman to earn it. The woman wants the male to strive for his orgasm and wants to delay it as much as possible to enjoy the benefits.

Before I go on rambling about the subject, I think I would like to shed a bit more light into it. There will be time and space for more on later posts, but since I decided to dare say that there is only one rule to all this, I guess I wanted to put a little of detail at what the rule means for me. To do so, I’m splitting The One Rule into its four sections. This post will be a little long, but I don't expect that this will be so for every post.

1) The male wants to earn an orgasm

The power of an orgasm cannot be overstated. It is a powerful motivator to action, a valuable prize, something men chase constantly.  Being hunters by nature, nothing pleases men more that catching their prey, but hunters don't pride themselves in catching a sickly, slow and easy prey (although they will still catch it in times of hunger). Men want to catch the dangerous one, the elusive one, and have been known to obsess over "the one that got away". Truth be told, no prey will make the hunter feel more invigorated and powerful than a hard to catch one. 

I have found this metaphor useful in explaining my feelings before, and I'm sure I'll use it again in the future, but for now, let me just state the logical conclusion: The harder it is for the man to get an orgasm, the more value it will have for him. And the reverse is also true. 

2) [The male] is willing to do as much as he can to please his woman to earn it

Deep inside, even though we may not express it in so many words, I think we men know that women hold the keys to our sex lives and that by pleasing them, we are increasing our chances of enjoying more fruitful sex lives. It is just common sense, in a way, because if the missus is happy, everybody is happy, but if she's tired, cranky and overwhelmed by her own problems, there will be little left of her to give to us. Call it enlightened self-interest if you will. There is nothing strange or weird about it. Just the way things are.

Most women don't realize the immense power that they have over men, although they may have some fleeting encounters with it, especially at the beginning of a relationship. I believe all women have the capacity to learn how to use this power. 

Remember those famous women of history? The ones that had wars started because of them, that drove the leaders of nations to madness, or to glory? I think they are not as special as historians would have us believe. They just understood and knew how to use their power over men. Men, in general will go to surprisingly great lengths for the sake of pleasing a woman.

3) The Woman wants the male to strive for his orgasms

Again, it may not be something that is articulated in these words, but women feel gratified when men court them, and I mean courting them properly, whistling at them from a construction site does not count. They feel good when a man, their man, vies for her attentions and treats her in a romantic manner. 

In the basest sense, and forgive me to put it so bluntly, courtship is nothing but a ritualized strive to please in order to earn a reward, usually of a sexual or related nature. A man who is courting a woman is on his best behavior, is attentive to her needs and wants to see her happy. 

Remember, I'm not talking here about telling her what she wants to hear in order to get in her jeans. They can read through that. What they really enjoy is a man that values her so much that is willing to stop chasing after all other prey (that hunter metaphor again) and to devote his energy to her.

She may not really want it, but I think most women would enjoy the attentions and the effort of a devoted suitor.

4) [The woman] wants to delay [the male’s orgasm] as much as possible to enjoy the benefits

Mother knew best when she told her daughter not to put out on her first date. In these days of casual sexual encounters and relative promiscuity, the value of the orgasm has been greatly diminished, and so has the power women derived from its control. A man who can have an orgasm any time he wants does not feel the need to court women. 

A woman who learns how to delay a man’s gratification while keeping him wrapped by the flames of his desire for her, can enjoy a state of almost perpetual courtship, as it were, and the company of a man who will crave to please her.

That’s it.

There is so much more behind these simple phrases and their explanations, and I hope we’ll have the opportunity to discuss these in future posts.

Until next time.